Avenjah by Glenn Barr

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May 23, 2003 - 11:35 AM

Swollen Tongue Blues

Swollen Tongue Blues

I hate those days when my skin hurts all over. Those days when touching my sides is really horrible because of the pain. Thankfully, today is not one of those days. Today only my tongue hurts.

A couple of days ago I woke up and realized that my tongue really hurt. Not only did my tongue hurt, but it felt swollen. And on the sides there looks like there are little bumps or something. And the next day it still hurt.

I thought back over the events of the last couple of days. Did I burn my tongue on hot tea? Did I put something poisonous in my mouth? Did I leave my tongue hanging out while I was in the tanning booth? Am I allergic to this plastic mug I just started using?? What the fuck?

I told Blandman about it. He advised me that perhaps I should see a doctor if it continues. Then he began to question me about things I may have eaten over the last several days. I tried to remember – caviar, water, tea, fire ants (HAHA!!! No.), cinnamon gum….

"AHA!!" He said, "cinnamon gum! You've been chewing cinnamon gum?"

"Yes, and I don't usually because I hate cinnamon gum, it makes my tongue hurt."

Um, mystery solved.

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